As a Catholic female in the college environment, it is difficult to find religious men, or frankly even a man that wants to commit to a relationship. Hookups are such a normal occurrence on campuses that people are utterly shocked when I tell them I don’t believe in them. If a guy values me he will ask me on a date. They are more confused when they find out I am a virgin and saving myself till marriage. Therefore fellow readers, you can understand that it is quite a task to find an eligible bachelor to potentially be my future husband. Hence, I found it necessary to try out some dating apps in hopes to find my prince charming. I would like to share my experiences with each app.
(SIDE NOTE: Before I go into details I want to mention that it is disappointing that almost all dating apps are based on looks verses the important things like personality, faith, and morals.)
Christianmingle was the first one I had the guts to try out. The main issue I found with this app/website was that I couldn’t message anyone with out paying a monthly fee, which is not ideal for a broke college student. I manage to get around paying, by finding some of the men on social media and messaging them that way. (Probably not the safest thing to do)
The other downside to this site was there was a very limited selection, not many people are on it. Many of the men weren’t attractive, which I know sounds shallow, personality of course comes first, but you do have to be attracted to them in your own special way. Many of the men that I was interested in weren’t even in America or too far away to make sense to date.
The positives of this app was all the men that I did talk to were very sweet and never made any sort of sexual or degrading comments. Another plus is that all the men cared about God and their faith. I did end up going on a date with one guy Tony. He was nice but we had nothing in common so it didn’t end up working out. I deleted the app after that because there weren’t enough options in men left.
Honestly I swore I would never try Tinder because it was a hookup app full of “fuck boys”. (Excuse my language) But I was home from break and feeling lonely. I determined to just try it out. The biggest problem I had with this app was how the men would talk to women. Every other guy that messaged me would start the conversation with a sexual or crude pickup line. This would cause me to automatically block them. I also receive many “Hey you are cute, Netflix and chill tonight?” This is super frustrating for someone who is looking for a date or a relationship.
Then this cute guy named Sam messaged me with Don’t Stop Believing lyrics. He seemed nerdy and cute (my type). So I agreed to have coffee with him the next day. We had a ton in common and he was extremely intelligent, scratch that, he was a genius. He was charming and romantic, truly swept me off my feet. (ladies be weary of the charmers)
The date was going so well that we extended coffee into us going to see the newest Star Wars movie. We continued to go on dates for roughly a week. But I was ignoring some big red flags along the way. This is a common happening when you become infatuated with another person.
Anyways I came to find out he believed that one person should be able to marry multiple people, and he needed sex …a lot of it. These were two big nos in my book. So I quickly ended things with him. I am glad I did because it would have definitely ended in an abusive relationship. For example he used sexist language, he viewed other women more as objects than people. He wanted to have all the power in the relationship. He just was not the type of person I was looking for at all. (or any woman) After this experience I decided I would never use this app again. Tinder lives up to its reputation as a hook up app.
Out of all the dating apps, this one is my top pick. The main issue is it only works in big cities. I live in Chicago an even there, there were slim pickings. I received roughly a total of two rude comments out of many guys I chatted with. You can count on a good conversation and invites to go on a date instead of just an offer to watch Netflix and chill. I went on a date with one fellow. He was Catholic and was an actor. The only issue was he was not ready for a relationship and ended up just using me as a rebound. I don’t blame the app but I ended up deleting it anyways.
I took a break from dating apps for a while because I dated a long time friend but it ended on a sour note. I decided to try online dating again. Bumble was a newer one that is considered the feminist dating service. On this app the female is the only one who can message first. The biggest issue is that I will have a good conversation going with a guy and then he will randomly stop messaging me. I haven’t got a single date from this app. I have also received offensive messages, not to the extent of the ones I received on Tinder but still vulgar. Although, there are many people who have an account on this app, almost as many as Tinder.
To sum it up, I would not recommend dating apps if you are looking for something serious or someone that values their faith. It is possible to find this on an app but it is much more unlikely. I guess we are going to have to meet men the old fashion way. Please share and comment with your own experiences on dating apps!